Didn’t See That Coming: Putting Life Back Together When… – A Reflective Review
I picked up Didn’t See That Coming: Putting Life Back Together When… by Rachel Hollis with a blend of curiosity and skepticism. The title itself offers a promise: that even when life blindsides us, there’s a path back to wholeness. However, as I dove in, I found myself engaging in a bit of an emotional tug-of-war, and I believe it’s worth sharing that experience.
Rachel’s exploration of life’s unprecedented hardships is framed by her own tragic stories, particularly when discussing the loss of her brother. My heart genuinely went out to her, as I know all too well the pain of losing someone at a tender age. This connection initially drew me in, making me hopeful that her journey could provide valuable insights for others navigating trauma, including my own.
However, it didn’t take long for me to feel the book’s tone veering into territory that felt dismissive of more profound emotional struggles. At one point, Rachel writes, “There should absolutely be shame in slowly drowning [financially] while pretending that life is fine so none of your ‘friends’ know that you’re struggling.” This struck a nerve for me. Shame, as Brene Brown so astutely defines, is far different from guilt. The former is about feeling inherently flawed, while the latter can be a constructive force. It left me wondering if Rachel had considered the implications of her words.
Throughout the narrative, I felt an undercurrent of “stop wallowing” that made me uneasy. While I was in a flourishing phase of my life, I couldn’t help but think of those who might reach for this book during their darkest days. The idea of merely grieving a little and then moving forward seemed excessively simplistic when grief is, by nature, a deeply individual journey. In some moments, Rachel’s insights felt like a parade of resilience wrapped in the phrase “don’t be dumb.” I couldn’t shake the feeling that those words might alienate someone grappling with their reality.
Her commentary on grief also veers into oddly personal territory, such as her assertion that you should be able to laugh at a funeral. For anyone who’s faced significant loss, such a statement can be deeply unsettling. I found myself wishing Rachel would acknowledge the myriad ways people process loss instead of asserting her own approach as the gold standard.
Moreover, when addressing financial struggles, she suggests starting a side business as the magic antidote. While entrepreneurship can indeed be empowering, the reality is that it’s not a one-size-fits-all solution. The sarcasm in my thoughts during that part of the book was impossible to ignore.
While reading, I couldn’t help but feel that Rachel was processing her grief from her divorce through the lens of this book. And while vulnerability can be a powerful narrative tool, it can also come across as uninviting if not delicately handled, leaving readers feeling more isolated in their struggles than understood.
In conclusion, Didn’t See That Coming might resonate with those who appreciate bold, direct advice and a personal voice echoing resilience. For others wrestling with their own tribulations, it may serve as a jarring reminder that grief and struggle are unapologetically unique to each individual. While I appreciated Rachel’s intent to inspire, I came away yearning for a more nuanced approach—one that recognizes the depth of human emotion rather than striving to gloss over it.
If you’re looking for a personal memoir detailing one woman’s experience, you might find some nuggets of wisdom here. But if you’re in need of gentler guidance through hard times, consider exploring alternatives that embrace the full spectrum of grief and healing.
Discover more about Didn’t See That Coming: Putting Life Back Together When… on GoodReads >>
